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hello from a frazzled stay at home mom
hello i am a stay at home mom and have been for about 8 years i am dealing with a difficult 4 yr old girl who can at times try to patience of a saint. i figure i will be at school just about every day. Hopefully i am exagerating! hopefully! I have always been happy to be here for my kids(I have 3) but recently i just feel like i am missing out on my own life but i want to be here more than anything. just wondering if anyone else feels that yurning? Somedays are just fine! But others i just crave the outside world although i am not sure i would even like it. I did work at one time and hated every day of it but only had one child at home at the time! Does anyone else have these problems?
Comments
tried it, sorta
I went back to college last semester, 16 hours (5 classes). Missed my three children terribly (ages 2-7) and decided that I probably would never work outside the home as long as I had children there. The socialization was fun, though. But it was just two days a week. How on earth would I handle working full time? I had always planned on returning to work, but that one semester totally changed my mind.
I was missing a life, too. Then I realized that this IS my life! It's not what I had before, or what I had dreamed it would be, but I love it now and wouldn't change it. Sorta a "don't know what you got til it's gone" type of thing. But I realized it before it was gone.
smart
You are one smart lady Jenny. I still admire your decision, though I was a bit surprised.
Kim, I can empathize with you. I work PT now, but am contemplating FT next school year. My kids will be in 1st and 3rd grades then. It is a tough decision.
Andrea
Kim - I think it is called motherhood!
Wanting to best and the most for your kids but also wanting the best and most for yourself.....or at least SOMETHING for yourself. I have been there and would say am there at the moment. What is it with difficult 4 yr olds? I live with one also. He is a strong personality and easily frustrated so that most things are an explosion! Especially b/w he and DH! I am not sure how old your other ones are and these are just suggestions.....maybe a little time apart for you two.........she can be in preschool a couple of times a week and you taking that time to TOTALLY do something for yourself. Not the regular mommy thinking of "I have a couple of hours, I need to do this and this and that and this......" But really taking that time for YOU! Like I said I am not sure the ages of your other kids and how that would work but seems like you just need a breather! To get your head straight and take a deep breath from mommyhood!
Just know we are here and you are welcome to vent. We are in this together!!!
You will be in my thoughts!
Jana
sometimes the outside calls me...
I think how easy it would be to leave the house in the morning and not think about the dirty dishes, clothes and leaking faucets. I daydream about wearing sophisticated clothes, and wowing folks with my elequent speech and ideas. Then I realize, the dirty clothes, dishes and leaky faucet will still be there when I get home. I look at how quickly my kids change now in a day(I have 4), and shake off that nitemare!
I love being at home, we worked hard so that I could do this. Once the kids are in school, I will go back to a volunteer job, but my days in the work force are over. Thank goodness!
AnneP.
A child enters your home and makes so much noise you can hardly stand it--then departs, leaving the house so quiet you think you'll go mad. -Dr. J.A. Holmes
stay at home moms everywhere!
I stayed at home for awhile with my first, and had to return to workfor our medical insurance. When I had my son 2 1/2 years later, I did stay at home full time. I was always lucky enough to have family close by and they babysat. I worked 3 days a week, one day she would be with my mom, one day my mother-in-law, and one day with my grandparents. It was such a perfect soloution, and I realize how blessed I was to have them. My third was born 5 1/2 years later, and again I stayed home. Having been on both sides of the fence, and after talking to hundreds of moms over the years, (I am a hairstylist), I truly feel if you can work just part time its great! It gets you out of the house, gives you and the kids a break from each other, and you feel like you are contributing to the family finances. While your kids are with another person, it gives them a chance for change. They get the opportunity to interact with someone other than "MOM". After a few hours away, I would return home revived, and ready to tackle those dishes and laundry! I am the type of person who, the less time I have, the more I can accomplish. If I am home all day, it seems nothing gets done. With working a few hours, I have to be more organized. How 'bout other moms? Libby
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